Thirteen random things:

1. "Findings on this polysomnography may not fully explain the patient's subjective complaints of fatigue and unrefreshing sleep." Duh.

2. We ordered carpet for the basement... anyone with ideas for fundraising cause the money tree I tried to plant in the backyard isn't growing.

3. School started. Yippeeeeeeeee!!!

4. The smile on his face is thanks enough! (And calling me a kick-ass Doula)

5. I am now hooked on Celebrity Duets. The guys from Queer Eye and Queer As Folk can sing!

6. Is it wrong that I watched Celebrity Fit Club, Oprah (about a 400 lb woman) and Discovery Health (about a 625 lb woman) then went out for a cheeseburger?

7. Did I mention school started?

8. I have got to get back to the healthclub. I feel like a big blob of jello... I know the cheeseburger did not help.

9. Have you heard about Smencils? They are apparently the new thing to have. We just ordered a case for our school store.

10. The schools discourage kids from using MySpace and I just got a flyer home from one of my sons high school teachers and he has a MySpace site listed. He does say clearly that if you link yours (the kids) to his or comment with your site link that he is obligated to report any bad behavior.

11. I have made dinner three times this week. Believe me... that is a miracle.

12. Speaking of miracle of miracles... my 4yr old niece's (is that correct english) favorite movie is Fiddler on the Roof. She walks around the house with a blanket over her head singing "Matchmaker, matchmaker make me a match... he's tall and wide from side to side" You have to know the song to find that funny.

13. What ever happened to Getupgrrl? Anyone know? Just wondering.

My doctor has been "recommending" to me for a long time that I do a sleep study. Yesterday I decided to call for some information because I am due for a refill on my Ambien and I always panic that she is going to say no. The lady that answered was very nice and explained to me a bit about the study and said they happened to have a cancellation for tonight if I wanted to get it done with. I was a bit anxious, but she said it really is no big deal and it may be good to get it done instead of thinking about it. I agreed and went to the hospital sleep center at 8:30pm.

A bit of background... I have had sleeping problems since I can remember. When in my parents house I used to yell downstairs if I heard the TV from the living room. I left a hotel room with my dad and sister when I was 17 and got my own room because my sister was snoring. My husband and I have been married for 16 years and have not consistently slept in the same bed. Birds chirping, ceiling fan spinning, the DVR and other people breathing drive me insane. I usually wear earplugs. Oddly, having the TV on to something that I have seen before (or any Will & Grace episode) helps me relax because I concentrate on that. Having 4 kids, a husband and a cat... in addition to all the to-do lists in my head make it impossible for me to turn my brain off. I take Ambien... I have for about 4 years. It is prescribed, I am not buying it off the internet or stealing it from others and I take it as prescribed.... I do not take it when my husband is out of town or when I am on call because it puts me to sleep and I may need to wake up. But I take it almost every night... because it works.

I do not snore regularly or gasp for breath. I do not have high blood pressure, am not more than 30 lbs overweight and I do not twitch or kick at night. (All signs of Apnea or Restless Leg syndrome) I have Insomnia... plain and simple. I also do not drink coffee, tea or pop.

Back to last night.... I get to the hospital and a man comes down to get me and another man who was also doing a sleep study. A large, black man who states he will be the one "observing" me during the night. What happened to the nice nurse on the phone? We walk to the sleep center hallway and no one else is there... OK, I am in a far off hallway, alone with a large man watching me while I am sleeping and another man in the next room. I am a little taken back. The words, "the call is coming from inside the house" kept popping into my head. I go to my room and start filling out the paperwork. The man in the next room turns on the TV in his room and I can hear every word as if the TV was in my room. Go back to above when I said that I yell downstairs to have the TV turned down. OK, now I am in a room with a large man watching me sleep and can hear the TV from the next room. (I won't make this like the 12 days of Christmas song... but feel free to keep adding these scenarios together) I turn my TV on to the same station so it does not drive me insane and he is watching Dateline about JonBenet. Not exactly Will & Grace.
Then I get hooked up. I wish I would have thought to take a picture with my camera phone, but at this point I was half laughing and half crying. In my head cursing my doctor for putting me through this and on the other hand glad that I will be able to prove my point and not have to worry about this again. There were wires coming off my face, behind my ears, attached to my scalp, on my legs. Two straps across my chest and this unbelievably uncomfortable piece of plastic under my nose. I am thinking, "you have got to be kidding me". This picture is not me... I was definitely not smiling. It took about 30 minutes for all these wires and straps and tape and goop to be put on and then another 30 minutes to try to lay down without a wire or strap to be pinching or pulling somewhere. I was allowed to take my Ambien for the night and drifted off about 30 minutes after all that.
I woke up to the man talking to someone in the hallway and to the beep of a machine. Thinking I had made it until morning. Right. I looked at my phone (no clocks) and the time was 2:30am. I laid there quietly for about 15 minutes and the man came in to see if I needed anything (because he was watching me and knew I was not sleeping). I got unplugged and went to the bathroom and then asked how long I needed to be monitored because I did not think I was going to be able to fall back asleep. He said to give him another 45 minutes "for insurance purposes" and if I was not back to sleep he could unhook me. I left at 3:30am and went home.

Results take about a week and IF I have Apnea, I will eat my words. But right now I am thinking that was a complete waste of time and money and just give me my little pills and leave me to my drug induced sleep. Ahhhhh Ambien.

I have been thinking lately that this blog is pretty boring. I am not very open about my life and it has definitely come across here. I decided to start talking about other stuff I would like to share opinions on... to gather thoughts... to rant... to discuss. Hopefully, my 2 readers will be OK with that :-)

My sister had her second baby 10 months ago... an adorable little girl, who has an auntie that loves her. Her 4 year old sister, who is also very much loved by her auntie, was born via c-section because she would not descend. I was there, as a sister/doula. There was no getting that baby down. Pushing, position changes... she wouldn't budge. And her heartbeat went down every time indicating that the cord was being compresses. The doctor was wonderful... he even gave it one more shot in the operating room before the c-section. He also let me stay, which gives him a permanent place in my heart. Anyway, my sister chose to have a repeat c-section for her second. I did not agree with her choice, but respected her decision and let it go. Plus the result was this... two little girls who has an auntie that loves them. The shirts say so.
My current client is going through a similar situation. One difference... I am hired, not related. Another is that she wants a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean). She wants it bad. I was not there for her first so I can only go by what she tells me. Basically, her cervix did not open past 6cm and after of hours of labor, a c-section was performed. She said she was confined to bed (problem 1) and not given options of changing positions (problem 2). Anyway... she now wants to discuss VBAC with her doctors and they pretty much shoot her down. They want her to schedule a Section and do it now (she is only 27 weeks) because of the holiday schedule (her due date is Nov 6, unless Election Day is a holiday, I am not sure what they are talking about). Again, I am supportive because this is not my situation, not my birth and not my life. BUT, she hired me as a professional and is asking my opinion. I explained to her that unless there is a medical reason to write in red "C-Section" all over your chart, you may want to get a second opinion. Bluntly, switch doctors. Because if the doctor does not agree, especially this early on... it most likely won't happen. I am not sure what she will decide.
Another situation... I emailed my cousin yesterday to say Happy Birthday. She is due Sept 11th and told me they have an induction date scheduled for Sept 5th. She lives in Arizona, so I am not going to be there as a relative or doula. I keep quiet. Let me just add that the reason she WANTS to be induced is so she can come back to Illinois for her 20th High School Reunion.
There are reasons for everything... people make choices for different reasons. Many factors go into making choices. I respect the fact that someone may make a decision that I wouldn't make. That does not mean I don't get frustrated and concerned. Does any of this frustrate and concern you?